A while back I had the pleasant request to post an article from AskMen.com about a top 10 rank list of the hottest female vampires to hit the screen ever. Up until know I never thought of ranking anything, but if AskMen.com can do it all the time, it’s time to kick butt here on this stage as well. So I turned to the one thing I loved so much and could rank, hot women in spandex or leather with super powers. However I knew that not all people would read so much comic books and I decided to cast a Top 10 of actresses to portray either a heroine or villainess in a big screen movie. The criteria is recognition to the public, actual hotness and the ability to portray the role.
10. Mina Harker: Victorian Vixen. Movie: The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Actress: Peta Wilson.
As you have seen Mina Harker is definitely not dressed in leather and she doesn’t portray the typical superhero. She is just a different species, but featured in the comic book series and the 2003 motion picture, Mina Harker, created by Bram Stoker for “Dracula”, is a Victorian age savior of the world from evil. What made me feature her was the play mostly. Peta Wilson does a striking job switching from a reserved and polite lady and a very violent vampire. Who doesn’t love a chick that can scale walls, fly and call a flock of bats.
9. Elektra: Spiky Red. Movies: Daredevil & Elektra. Actress: Jennifer Garner
The concept of a woman in smoking red or black as it happens leather and fork weapons is hotter than hell itself, since you get a mega pack. She can stab, pierce, slash and whirls around and around, which gives a pretty good visual on how hot her body is. Jennifer Garner did quite the show kicking ass, but I thought her character was way underdeveloped. Plus there was that stare like a wounded animal, which crashed the style of Marvel’s most lethal and cold blooded assassin. It’s true you simply can’t bear to hurt a woman looking like she has lost her newborn, but it’s very untypical for such a character.
8. Mary Embray: Um, the Immortal version of Ms. Marvel? Movie: Hancock. Actress: Charlize Theron.
Mary Embray doesn’t exist really outside the movie Hancock as a character, which is kind of sad. The comic book universe might have used her. This position is an exception from the rules for this rank list, mainly because a woman lifting a truck, because a superhero hobo is running on her last nerve is sexy. Charlize Theron manages to portray the superhero woman’s scorn and thus earn her spot on number eight.
7. Invisible Woman: Transparent and Hot. Movie: The Fantastic Four 1&2. Actress: Jessica Alba
Jessica Alba should have played the female version of the Human Torch, because she is smoking. I have to admit that she has enough sex appeal to give away to the needy. She even played the character right, but the ass kicker of Sue is under question here. Being invisible is cool and so are force fields, but it saddens me to see that in general she is just sweet and defensive, when all her talents can be used in such violent ways. Referring to the force fields that is. Yes, that may be so, but Sue is devised to be the American Sweetheart in the superhero world, the reason Jessica is stuck on spot number seven.
6. Storm: Sizzling. Movies: The X-Men series. Actress: Halle Berry
Halle Berry has an affiliation to superhero roles as it would seem by her incarnation as Storm and Catwoman, Patience Phillips. However seeing that Catwoman is Selina Kyle, I voted in favor for the white haired mutant. One of my favorite characters ever created I was disappointed to see her role in the X-men movies reduced. The plot centered more around Jean Grey, so it’s understandable that most characters would be underdeveloped. However even if the role was small and not as power boosted as I would have liked, Halle Berry handled the task formidably. Her position here is cemented with the CGI scene with the cluster of tornadoes, which blew my mind away. I would wish her fly and do the human lightning rod gig as well, but may be another movie.
5. Lady Deathstrike: The Adamantium Manicure. Movie: X2: X-Men United. Actress: Kelly Ann Hu
Okay, so she had no back story in the second movie and all she did was come on the stage, shred Wolverine to pieces and then die by his hand. That really doesn’t earn much points for actor skills, but considering her role Kelly Ann Hu portrayed a mindless killing machine with ice cold beauty and as we have seen over the years Asian woman, who know martial arts are always a force to be reconned with, especially when they have blades protruding from their finger tips. As far as the character is recognized I am not sure whether there is a major uproar around Deathstrike, but I am sure the movie boosted her a lot. Number five is well deserved.
4. Mystique: Scally but Fun. Movies: X-Men series. Actress: Rebecca Romijn
The X-Men universe offers a great choice of women with power rather than any other comic book series. Batman, Superman, Spiderman, Ironman and so on have always been valiant knights saving their Louis Lanes, Marry Janes and what not. So most naturally the X-Men movies will provide a decent number of characters involved. Mystique is one of them. Rebecca Romijn promises an unforgettable performance, which leaves you with open mouths. Mystique is known to be a Machiavellian, but Rebecca’s bitchier vixen with reptilian behavior take on the character Mystique takes on a new level of evil ass-kickery. Her character in the movies is controversial since she is deadly, ruthless and yet loyal, which brought her end in the third movie. And Rebecca was hot in her demise.
3. Jean Grey: Quantum Physics in Leather. Movies: X-Men series. Actress: Famke Janssen
Jean Grey is limitless power and as much as I telekinesis the saint aspect of her personality is not that compelling. However when the Phoenix came into the game and suddenly Jean Grey was all red and pyrokinetic, I was ecstatic, because Jean killed around five billion people in the comic book, while in the movie she turned schizophrenic and joined Magneto. I fancy heroes turning villains and thanks to the CGI team Famke aced the transformation and did unspeakable things. For this third place is secured for her. The red leather outfit couldn’t replace the missing flames in the movies, but gave the much needed villain aura.
2. Liz Sherman: Inferno Tempered. Movies: Hellboy 1&2. Actress: Selma Blair.
Liz doesn’t have a fancy name, doesn’t wear spandex, isn’t Marvel, yet she managed to land a place so high on the rank list. The Hellboy movies definitely made her character recognizable, although slightly modified to the movies’ needs. Liz is one of the few women pyrokinetics and her usual melancholy self mixed with a short temper for contrast make her a ticking time bomb. Selma Blair resembles Liz physically and has the voice and facial expression to breathe life to how Liz should be felt by people. She is most notable for her self-ignition, where she becomes something like a human torch which explodes to a nova. Spectacularly handled in the movies so far, which makes Liz hot, both literally and metaphorically speaking.
1. Catwoman: The Latex Kitty. Movie: Batman Returns. Actress: Michelle Pfeiffer
Let’s first start with the costume, which although resembles the comic book version is latex, tattered and screams insanity. Catwoman has never been so deranged and unpredictable. Michelle nailed the part. Playing, when your body is denied any freedom by the tight almost vacuumed suit, is a feat on its own and then incorporate the trademark metal cat claws, the whip, the feline movements and add instable behavior. In the DC universe Selina Kyle is a human with no super powers. She has to rely on herself to succeed and for a woman with a cat obsession to avoid most attempts to be captured by Batman, who has fancy gadgets, makes her the ultimate masked woman in leather to ever appear on the big screen. Thus number one is for her.
A Side Note: I would have personally enjoyed if movie makers decide to add the Scarlet Witch, Sister Grimm, Poison Ivy (ignoring the Uma Thurman catastrophy), Emma Frost and Harley Quinn in future projects. I am sure that those movies will be blockbusters, because people love a scantily clad woman with super powers.